Dear Blog (my silent listener),

I’m confused. I feel such a sense of void. A null feeling whereby I seem to have lost myself in my thoughts, actions. Things I did, and things I wanted to do but couldn’t make my decision.

I'm Angie. I have lovely friends. I have the kindest mummy & the most bubbly younger sis whom I love very much. Perhaps I have too much good things in life I never had the chance to learn how to go for things I wanted. Thus I’m sitting here waiting for that miracle I’m hoping for to happen. I feel useless for I’ve been in a stew about it for 6 long years.

I think I’m pretty okay with verbal communicating & I speak uber fast, but somehow this gift of mine fails me everytime I wanted to get into serious stuff. Say conveying my feelings to someone special. I don't know myself that well after all... but one thing for sure is that I'm learning to be slow to speak, especially at sensitive and serious stuff. Reason's to ensure I convey my thoughts to the last sentence in my head.

So, I get misunderstood because I am too indecisive with my words & emotions. I miss the crucial moments cause I somehow am too indesicive. And of course, huge and undesirable misunderstandings happen.

And the words exchanged becomes redundant, very redundant and very uber redundant. I’ll get tongue tied too u know?

A friend of mine just reminded me that I couldn’t be this stagnant anymore. I’ve gotta grin & bear it whether or not the result is desirable. No more humming & hawing now that I’ve wasted so much time. I’m darn nervous about moving on but that friend of mine knocked too much sense into me for me to stay the confused me.

Behind every face lies a story; every heart has its sadness. A smile or that loving tenderness.

Isn't it amazing that I can feel this way too? Well, perhaps, its simply a good reminder that I'm human too.

Love,
Me